Hercules: Hetalia Edition
by Reflective Reviewer 7
Summary: It's a USUK Hercules story! Have fun, don't make Ivan mad, and we'll all walk away happy. Enjoy!
1. Those Muses

**Opening!**

**Me: I'm back, my lovely readers, to once again destroy your happy childhood memories! ^_^**

**Ivan: And I will be helping, Da?**

**Me: Yes. Yes you will. Ladies and Gentlemen and Fangirls, meet my villain and glomp victim, Russia!**

**Ivan: Pleased to be meeting you. I am sure you will love this story or be destroyed for flaming it… ^J^**

**Me: Nice. On with this mad plotline! Hercules: Hetalia Edition.**

**I own nothing sadly…**

* * *

**Those Muses are ****My**** Muses… -_-;**

A dark room lightens to reveal an impressive collection of vases plates and statues from the lost times of Ancient Greece. And her son himself actually begins to speak, in a slow and sleepy tone.

_"Long ago in far away lands of Ancient Greece, there was a golden age of powerful gods, and extraordinary heroes. And the greatest and strongest of all these heroes was Alfred. But what is really the measure of a true hero? Well, that is what our story is ab-_"

_"Aiyah! Will you listen to him? Aru~"_ Upon closer inspection the man sees a vase with its painted figures moving. The one whom interrupted him was a fairly tall Asian with a short ponytail hanging over his shoulder. _"You are making story sound like tired tragedy!"_

_"Hai, it might be best to let us continue from here, Narrator-San."_ Said another man. He had deep brown eyes and short black hair.

_"Well… Okay, why not?"_

The tallest cleared his throat and they all bowed at the waist. _"We are the muses. Aru~ Gods and Goddesses of the Arts and proclaimers of heroes!"_

_ "Heroes like Alfred-san."_

_"Oh yeah, and didn't he have a steamy little story?" _A woman with long brown hair interjected.

_"Miss Elizabeta, please."_

_"Don't twist the tale until we actually get to that part."_ A teenage seeming muse added. She had short, spiked, brown-blonde hair and was the only one not wearing white. Her robes were deep blue and her eyes were hazel.

**(A.N. Everyone, meet Diana aka Tasmania, she's my O.C. Please, just bare with me, I needed at least five Muses!)**

_"It is true, though."_ Said another girl with brown hair and pigtails. She and Elizabeta giggled.

_"Michelle! Do not encourage her! Aru~" _The taller man frowned.

_"Sorry, sorry. Of course, our story actually begins long before Alfred, many eons ago."_ They jumped free of their painting and started to sing, the other pottery moved to simulate the story.

_"Back when the world was new! The planet earth was down on its luck. And everywhere gigantic brutes called Titans ran amuck!" _Diana started.

_"It was a nasty place! It was a mess where ever you stepped!"_Yao sang.

_"Where chaos reigned and earthquakes and volcanoes never slept!"_

They all joined in. _"But then along came Swe."_

_"He hurled his thunderbolt!" _Elizabeta cried.

_"He zapped!"_

_"Locked those freaks into a vault!"_ Diana cheered.

_"They're trapped!"_

_"And on his own stopped chaos in its tracks! And that's the gospel truth! The guy was too type A to just relax!"_

Elizabeta, Michelle, and Kiku finished. _"And that's the world's first dish!"_

_"Swe tamed the globe while still in his youth!"_ Diana explained via tune.

_"And honey, it may seem impossible, but that's the gospel truth!"_

_"On Mount Olympus life was neat and smooth and sweet, vermouth. Oh though honey it may seem impossible, that's the gospel truth!"_

* * *

A vase forms into a real setting of a great mountain that stretched high into the clouds. A magnificent palace sat atop it. This was Olympus, home of the Gods.

A great gathering was taking place to celebrate a new birth. Gods of every kind were gathered to give gifts and party! And at the very center stood a short male with blonde hair and brown eyes named Tino. He was watching over a little baby godling with blue eyes and hair like his. "Shush, Alfred." The baby pulled Tino's small crown from his head. "Oh, behave yourself!" He scolded lightly, taking back the crown and replacing it on his head.

An intimidating man stepped up behind the smaller and the baby just giggled. "He's pretty cute." Tino jumped and turned around.

"Ugh, Berwald I really wish you wouldn't do that!" The stern looking man smiled somewhat and wrapped his arm around the other.

"S'ry." Tino relented from the muttered apology and turned back to their son, whom was reaching for one of Swe's thunderbolts.

He tried to move away so that Alfred couldn't reach, but didn't get far with Swe's hold on him. "Dear? Please keep those away from the baby." He informed nervously. It was a bit too late as Alfred snatched one and tried to chew on it, getting a shock.

With an irritated cry he flung the bolt across the room where it narrowly missed many of the guests and was finally knocked into a podium by the Goddess of Wisdom's sword. A blonde haired woman with glasses and copper eyes. (A.N. Another self insert? Whatever do you me- *Bricked.*) The pillar immediately reformed.

"Woo! Like, quite a spark the kid's got!" The God of the crossroads, Felix, flew over to the couple and presented a bouquet.

"Oh, they're beautiful!" Tino exclaimed. He put Alfred down in his cradle and sniffed the flowers.

"Yep, I arranged them myself!" The male did a dramatic bow.

Berwald chuckled, patting his son's head. "On behalf of m' son, I want to thank you all for your wonderful gifts."

"What about our gift, dear?" Tino reminded.

"Ah, yes." Berwald grabbed a mix of passing clouds and bent them into a complicated shape of a horse with wings. He presented this too his son. Alfred curiously prodded the head shape and the cloud around it poofed away leaving an actual young colt's face. The little thing snorted lightly and then stood up shaking away the rest of the clouds. "His name, is Pegasus, and he's all yours son." The winged horse stepped off Swe's hands and nearly fell before his wings started fluttering.

The little baby grabbed the colt's ears and head butted him. After a brief moment of dizziness the young Pegasus whinnied playfully and returned the favor with a lick. Then the two hugged to the wide 'Aww' moments of the surrounding gods.

Tino tucked the boy into his cradle. "My darling little boy." He cooed while stroking his hair.

An icy chuckle floated over and shattered the serenity. "How sentimental."

All the gods looked over to a shadowed pillar with a tall figure leaning against it. The god was wearing a heavy coat, scarf, and an unsettling smile. "I haven't been this choked up since Natalyia tried to drag me down stairs by my scarf." The others sent him a reproachful look.

The man rolled his eyes and strolled over to the cradle. "What is this, an audience or a mausoleum?" Felix, in a commonly fearless cheerful attitude, threw an arm around him.

"So, Ivan, you finally made it? How are things in the basement?"

Ivan's left eye twitched somewhat and he shrugged off the messenger god's hand. "Oh, they're just fine! You know, a little dark, a little gloomy, and as always full of dead people! What are you gonna do though?" His grin became remarkably sarcastic. Searching around his gaze landed on the godling and he slid over with a fake happy tone. "Aww, there's the little sunspot! How cute."

Ivan waved his hand and smoke trailed from his fingers before forming into a spiked skull pacifier. "And here is a sucker for the little sucker. There you go baby." He tried to pop it in Alfred's mouth, but the child grabbed onto his finger instead, partially crushing it. "Hmm, powerful little tyke." The lord of the underworld nonchalantly pulled his hand away and dropped the sucker in the cradle. He hid the pain rather well.

Another God by the name of Mathias nudged the taller in the elbow. "Come on Ivan, don't be such a stiff! Join the celebration!" He took a gulp of the beer in his hand.

The lord of the dead frowned again. "Oh, trust me I'd love to, but unlike you Gods lounging about up here, I regrettably have a full time gig. That you, by the way, so kindly bestowed on me, Berwald." He shot the king a glare. "Sooooo… Can't. Love to, but can't."

Felix started to laugh. "Ha! Slow down, Ivan! You'll work yourself to death!" several of the other more inebriated Gods burst into laughter as well. "Heh, I kill myself!"

Ivan turned and stalked away muttering under his breath. "Haha. If only. If only…"

* * *

**Me: And there you have it folks! Before you ask, yes, I am using Swe as Berwald's nickname so please note that when I use either I am talking about the same character.**

**Ivan: Hurry up and write more, I want to see the underworld.**

**Me: I will soon! I just need a little help. Guys I still am not 100% sure whom to write as the Fates or Pain and Panic. Any ideas? I can't write the scene without them!**

**Ivan: Read, Review, and Respond.**

**Ja nee~**

**RR7**


	2. How do you kill a God?

**Opening!**

**Me: Oh lord help us, I found my characters!**

**Ivan: So, who are my minions?**

**Me: You'll see. By the way, how fire-proof are you?**

**Ivan: =J= Why are you asking? Kolkolkolkolkol…**

**Me: … :D**

**I own nothing sadly….**

* * *

**How do you kill a God?**

_"Now if there is one God you don't want to get steamed up, it's Ivan. Aru~"_Yao warned.

_"Because, he had an evil plan."_ Elizabeta continued. Diana took up a tune as the scene melted away again to the deep, dark, and gloomy atmosphere of Tartarus.

_"He ran the underworld, but thought the dead were dull and uncouth… He was as mean as he was ruthless, and that's the gospel truth…" _Ivan was ferried to his palace by the river Styx. A few souls grasped at his coat and white fire sprang up from body and burned them from his person. As they rounded the bend a gigantic dog with three heads growled threateningly. The lord of Hades picked up a steak from the floor of the boat and flung it to the beast.

_"He had a plan to shake things up! And that's the gospel truth!"_

Ivan disembarked on to a small flat of land that led up a grand stairway into his palace. "Ravis!" He screamed up the stairs. A small, frightened young man with blonde hair in a red uniform stumbled down the steps.

"Coming, sir!" The teen then unceremoniously tripped and began somersaulting down the stairs, every other step hitting his head until he rolled past Ivan and nearly into the Styx.

The underworld lord ignored him and called up again. "Eduard!" A taller and older teen with blue eyes and glasses followed the other down minus the tripping. He ran over to Ravis and pulled him away from the river before something tried to drag him down.

They both stood and saluted to Ivan. "Eduard and Ravis reporting for duty!"

Their boss just rolled his eyes. "Fine, Fine, Fine, just let me know the instant the Fates arrive."

Ravis smiled obliviously. "Oh they're here!"

Ivan turned in a sudden temper and his body burst again into white fire. "What?! The Fates are here and you didn't tell me?!" The two started crying.

"We are worms!" As his minions sobbed this they really shrunk down into worms. "Worthless worms!" Taking deep breathes, Ivan's body returned to normal and he rubbed his temples.

"Memo to me, memo to me: Maim you after my meeting." He slammed a faucet pipe into the wall on his way up to the throne room. His subordinates glanced at one another in terror.

* * *

Up on the balcony of Ivan's palace three female Ancients of great power stood spinning the tapestry of Fate. All were rather beautiful, but had a twisted sense of humor. One in particular with vibrant red hair and emerald green eyes pulled a string taught and grinned at her companions. A second with deep brown hair in a bun strung with beads chuckled malevolently, and a third, a woman with long black hair wrapped into a tall crown, withdrew onyx shears from her long white robes.

"Darling," The fate in white warned the first. "Hold that mortal's thread of life good and tight." Her stenciled eyes flashed as she opened the scissors wide around the thread and snapped them shut in a second, severing it. A scream sounded through the underworld.

"Incoming!" Laughed the second Ancient, she waved at the new spirit as it trailed away into the field of Asphodel just past Ivan whom watched it go by disinterestedly. He turned back to the three with a bright smile.

"Ladies! So sorry I'm…"

"Late." The three finished with identical smirks.

"We knew you would be…" Said the brunette.

"We know everything!" Bragged the holder of the shears.

"Past."

"Present."

"And Future." Finished the red head. She nudged her friend. "By the way, remind me when we get home to invest in that internet invention. I see nothing, but profit off that thing." (A.N. :D *Shot.*)

"Um hmm." Their company answered shortly. "Yes, yes, I know. Anyway, I was at this party and I lost track of tim-"

"We know." The three cut him off again, the brunette even having the gall to start filing her nails.

Ivan's eye twitched. "Yes. I know… you know." Taking a breath he stepped over to a large chessboard with one side containing the Gods of Olympus and the other himself and his assembling army of monsters.

"So, Berwald… Mr. High and Mighty, now he has a-"

"Bouncing. Baby. Brat." The Fates intervened. _Again._

"We know!" Yelled the black haired Ancient.

Finally losing patience the king of the underworld screamed back, his body catching alight for the second time that day. "I Know! I know, you know. I got it, I got the concept, and so let me just ask. Is this kid going to mess up my hostile take over bid or what?" With a smoky flourish of his hand a little figure in a cradle materialized and was lightly placed on the Olympus side.

When he glanced back at the three he saw them to be turned away with their noses stuck in the air. Oh great, they were in a mood. "Oh please, Ivan." The brunette snapped.

"You for sure understand we're not supposed to reveal the future." The red head sniffed. A mischievous smile spread across the dark God behind them and he kneeled to tale the hand of the black maned keeper of the shears.

"Sorry, one moment please. May I just say that, you are looking absolutely gorgeous today? Like a regular Queen of the Nile, a Fate worse than death indeed."

The Ancient in question allowed her vanity loose and a smirk curled her lips. She leaned in close. "You flatter me boy."

Her friends rolled their eyes. The red haired, having enough of the mush, knocked the former's crown from her head causing it to bounce around the floor. This of course meant all Hell broke out. "Don't make me rip off your face, Igiko!"

"Like you could, Khemet! I'd kill you before you got the chance!"

"We're immortal you stupid witch!" Ganged the brunette. The red head, now revealed to be named Igiko, slapped the now introduced Khemet and tackled the other.

(A.N. Okay, so maybe these girls were actually looking for an excuse to fight… Who knew?)

"Don't make me find a way, you slimy little-"

She was pushed off the brown locked Fate. "Back off Hellas, darling. This is between us!" Khemet raised her arm to scratch Igiko, but her wrist was caught by the Lord of the Dead.

"Ladies, please…" He held out Khemet's crown to her. "My fate is in your lovely hands." After a brief exchange of expressions amongst the three the women simultaneously nodded. Khemet took back her crown and the other Ancients brushed the dirt off their robes.

"Oh, very well." Hellas raised her arms up and the two beside her did the same. A smoky illusion formed above them and their eyes went blank and white. "In eighteen years, precisely…"

"The planets will align ever so nicely…" Igiko joined.

Ivan scoffed. "Great, verse."

Khemet shouted suddenly. "The time to act shall be at hand! Unleash the Titans, your monstrous band!"

"Mm hmm, good."

"Then the once proud Swe will finally fall! And you, Ivan, will rule all!" Hellas proclaimed.

Ivan grinned and some flames leapt at his excitement. "Perfect."

A hissed laugh called his attention to Igiko. "A word of caution to this tale…"

"Excuse me?"

"Should Alfred fight, You Will Fail…" They all vanished with the illusion.

The air was tense for four minutes, not a word or breath, then…

"WHAT?!" The white fire erupted taking with it a seven foot diameter of the tile around the Lord of the Dead. "It's… it's okay. I'm cool. I'm fine." He panted through his teeth.

* * *

An hour of contemplation later had Ivan exiting an elevator into a deep vault of bone with his loyal subordinates. "Eduard." The mentioned flinched. "Ravis." The second sobbed. They both believed they were going to be flailed for their earlier mishap. Ivan had forgotten that a while ago though. He strolled casually into the room to where a strange object was kept suspended in an eerie blue light. "I've got a little riddle for you both. How do you kill a God?"

"I do not know!" Ravis announced nervously. Eduard stepped in before they were smacked.

"Uh… You can't! They're immortal!"

"Exactly, boys. They're immortal." Ivan reached into the light and retrieved a bottle of purple fluid. "So first you've got to turn the little sunspot… Mortal."

* * *

Back on Olympus the night was one of peace. The Goddess of the moon draped stars over the sky and all the Gods were settling to sleep. Unbeknownst to them two shadows fell over the cradle of a certain Godling.

Berwald was curled up with Tino in their room when the crashing and sounds of struggle woke them. They drowsily searched for its source. Swe silently and Tino barely waking enough to ask what the noise was when the star shaking realization hit them. "The baby!"

The King and Queen of the Gods sprinted into Alfred's room to find him missing and Pegasus trapped beneath the upturned bassinet. He whinnied wildly. Tino fell to his knees and screamed Alfred's name, falling into sobs.

Berwald shook in rage where he stood. His eyes flashed with the same electric blue as the skies. "No!"

* * *

Thunder crashed and lightning shot out from every angle, each time nearly zapping the employees of Tartarus. "Oh Gods, we've done it now! Swe is gonna use us for target practice!" Ravis shrieked.

"Just hang on to the kid!" Eduard retorted, dodging another bullet of electricity.

Alfred, for the most part, was smiling and giggling through the descent. Then came the trees. All three crash landed to mortal ground and due to a slight knock on his head, the poor baby started to cry. Eduard tried somewhat to calm him down. "Quick, quick, the potion."

Ravis popped a bottle top on the vial and shoved it in Alfred's mouth. "Here ya go kid, a little Grecian formula." The Godling began to drink it in confusion, his Olympian aura faded slowly from the feet up. "Look, he's… changing. Can we kill him yet?"

"No, he has to drink the whole potion! Every last drop." Suddenly a voice cut their triumph just as Alfred was finishing the formula.

"Who's there?" A strong man with slicked back blonde hair strode onto the deserted road, a smaller young man with brown-red locks and a bizarre curl falling behind.

Startled the two minions became bugs and scuttled beneath a rock. The bottle detached from Alfred's mouth and hit the ground, shattering and letting the single drop of potion left sink into the dirt. The baby began to cry again and the light from the couple's lantern fell on him. "Oh you poor thing!" The younger ran forward and scooped him into his arms. "There, there, don't cry."

"Is anyone there?" The older called to their surroundings. Spotting no one he turned back to his partner. "Seems he's been abandoned, Feli."

Coming out from the rock Ravis squeaked at Eduard. "Now?"

The other nodded seriously. "Now." They shape changed again, becoming venomous serpents and slid along the ground towards the mortals.

"Oh Ludwig, do you think we could take him in?" The blonde noticed a glimmering medallion hanging from the baby's neck with the symbol of the Gods. When he flipped it over it revealed the child's name.

"Hmm, Alfred. If we can't find his parents than maybe-" Ludwig looked up from the medal at a sudden hissing and barely had time to pull Feliciano away before they struck. The baby smiled widely and caught them mid-strike.

His new parents looked on with shock and slight apprehension as Alfred simply knocked the snakes' heads into the dirt a few times, tied them together into a knot and flung both well into the sky. The serpents giving a scream as they flew directly into a mountainside.

After watching them go the couple looked back down at the baby who laughed, waving Ravis and Eduard goodbye. Alfred smiled at the two in an adorably innocent way.

* * *

Meanwhile Ivan's minions had returned to their normal shape, granted it was very difficult as they had to get untied.

Ravis was having a near heart attack. "Oh… Ivan is going to kill us when he finds out!"

Eduard, whom was still a snake from the waist down trying to get his tail de-knotted, froze but then smiled at an idea. "You mean _if_ he finds out."

"Of course he's going to f-" A similar smile hit the younger as he registered the words. "_If_. If is good."

* * *

The muses spoke into the story once more. Yao starting the monologue. _"It was tragic. Aru~ Berwald led all the Gods on a frantic search…"_

Kiku continued. _"But by the time they found the baby, it was too late…"_

_"Young Al was mortal now… But since he did not drink the last drop, he still retained his God-like strength, so thank his lucky stars…"_ Elizabeta sang next.

_"But Swe and Tino wept… because their son could never come home. They'd have to watch their precious baby grow up from afar." _Michelle.

Diana finished off._ "Though Ivan's horrid plan was hatched before Al cut his first tooth… The boy grew stronger every day, and that's the Gospel Truth."_

_"The Gospel Truth…"_

* * *

**Me: *Breaths a sigh of relief.* Boy was that a chapter!**

**Ivan: You used to be able to write more.**

**Me: Will you stop it? I'm trying to pace the story at a reasonable speed. I can't just shove the whole thing out at once! I'd get no reviews!**

**Ivan: Fair enough. So are you going to tell the readers who the Fates were or make them guess?**

**Me: It's more fun to keep them guessing! So faithful readers just review the clues and figure it out!**

**See ya next chapter!**

**RR7**


	3. Go the Distance

**Opening!**

**Me: *Hiding behind 3-ft. high brick wall.* H-Hey guys! *Waves sheepishly.* How you been since the last update? *Shot.* Eep! *Ducks down.* You need me alive! Remember that?!**

**Ivan: *Standing completely fine a few meters away.* Eh… I guess they kind of do. Of course someone else could always just adopt and finish the story themselves after you were killed. ^J^**

**Me: … O_O …Ivan, what the Hell?! *Grenade lands by my foot.* Holy- *Flees behind Russia as it explodes.* Hahaha… Yeah, that's real, real funny Ivan, but then who would be able to make you humorously intimidating besides me? *Whispers in his ear.* Listen here, everyone has a weak point you sadistic overgrown chibi, and I swear to Rome I will lock you in a room with Belarus! Got it?**

**Ivan: OJO …**

**Me: *Leaps on a magically appearing stage.* Now if we're all done throwing people under busses, I'll be revealing who those crazy Fates were last chapter. The Ancients were in fact, Ancient Greece, Ancient Egypt, and Britannia.**

**Yes, Britannia is my head cannon mother of the British Isles. I just gave her Himaruya's name for Fem!England.**

**I own nothing sadly…**

* * *

**Go the Distance…**

18 years pass by in the blink of an eye, time goes on and a scene reveals itself to us. A dirt road leading to an outer market place surrounded on all sides by marble pillars. For the most part it's rather peaceful, let's fix that.

A cart filled to the clouds with hay flew down the road faster than should have been possible.

"Slow Down!" A scream resounded from the driver's seat, where surprisingly enough, the horse that should have been pulling the cart sat next to an older blonde man with slicked back hair. Laughter met his exclamation. The person pulling them along was a youth of roughly 18 years with light hair, one flyaway cowlick, and sky blue eyes. They passed under a gateway, much to the irritation of the workers atop it, whom were nearly sent to the ground.

"Watch where you're goin'!"

The young man smiled sheepishly and twisted his head up to shout over his shoulder. "Sorry guys!"

"Alfred stop!" The driver roared again. The now named youth, Alfred, turned to look ahead and ground his feet deep into the earth to halt his momentum. When the dust cleared he was buried up to his underarms in dirt. The older man grasped the fabric over his heart and took a few breaths before hopping from the cart.

He strode over to Alfred and pulled him out of the pit by the back of his shirt. "Thanks son. When Achilles twisted up his heel about a mile back I was sure we'd never get here." (A.N. I hereby formally apologize for that terribly lame pun. I'll try not to make anymore, but no promises.)

"Not a problem, dad." His son strolled over to the hay bales and effortlessly lifted the entire haul over his head.

"D-Don't unload just yet. I still have to go haggle a sale out of Govert."

"Oh, alright." With a grunt he let the hay fall back into the wagon. With so much weight on one side, the end with the driver's seat sprung upwards, launching their horse into the air. "Oops, sorry Achilles!" he called up.

Ludwig sighed and rubbed at the bridge of his nose. "Now Alfred, please, this time just-"

"I know, I know." He held his arms out and the aforementioned steed was caught. Alfred put the horse back in his seat. "Stay by the cart."

His father chuckled lightly. "I'll only be a minute." He stepped away. Alfred groaned and fell into a slump against wagon. This impatient waiting lasted moments before small sounds of struggle floated his way. The owner of a pottery shop was attempting to lift a ridiculously large urn, and failing. Just as it began to slip Alfred dashed forward and helped to support the jar with one hand.

"Whoa, careful there!" The shop owner let out a breath of relief.

"Thank you."

"No problem." The blonde swiveled his head around the side of the urn and the man's eyes immediately widened.

"A-Alfred? It's you!" He squeaked. Alfred grimaced but kept on anyway.

"Here, I'll take care of this." Before anymore could be said the shop owner bent backwards to take the jar's full weight.

"No, no, I've got it. You just run along."

"Are you sure?"

"Oh yes, I'm completely fine!" Alfred found himself shooed out of the shop with a curtain falling in front of the opening.

Disheartened, the youth started back towards the cart, when a discus landed by his feet. He scooped it up and with a hopeful smile saw some boys running over for it.

"Hey, give it here!" The one in front called. The group skidded to a stop in front of him, surprise and slight nervousness in their eyes.

Alfred, undaunted, asked. "Any chance you need an extra guy?"

The others pushed the boy who had first spoken closer. "Uh… Sorry, Al. But, we already have five and we want to keep it an even number." He gave a fake grin.

"Oh, alr- Hey! Five isn't an even-" The discus was snatched from his hands and the boys took off, some slinging insults back as they ran.

Giving up all together, Alfred went to sit on the edge of the market's fountain.

A whirl of air passed over his head and he looked up to see that same discus from before fly by. One of the original group that deserted him yelled out. "Heads up!"

Alfred sprung up and after the object. "I got it! I got it!" He sprinted in pursuit and took a leap. He caught it! His hand closed around the metal, and for a moment he felt like he might have finally done right by his peers.

The momentum however had other plans. With his feet off the ground and the discus moving so fast, Alfred had no choice but to follow its descent and subsequent crashing into one of the many pillars making up the market.

Wincing at the dull thrum of pain in his skull, Alfred's eyes shot open when an ominous cracking resounded in the structure behind him. "Uh oh." The column broke away from its connection at the top and rolled out of place. The blonde snapped to attention desperately trying to stop the inevitable and hold the pillar from its base. "No, no, no!"

He couldn't prevent what happened next, the end of the column hit the next in the row and from there on it was a domino effect on the left side of the market. Alfred tossed the pillar in his arms to save the crumbling area. The tossed architecture slammed heavily into the right side pillars resulting in the same problem as before.

Fast as he was, Alfred did not have the ability to be in two places at once. Every time he tried to steady one end the other just crumbled more. At this point his father had come back and was desperately attempting to simply grab his son and pull him from the scene.

Back at that pottery shop, the owner was having a breakdown for the fear of his breakables. His shop was directly in the center of the crumbling mass of pillars. "Oh my Gods! Oh no! Don't! Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!" The last of the columns fell against each other over his head and settled precariously. The man sighed in relief.

Then Alfred, whom had been running to save him, slipped and sped forward straight into him, knocking the architecture, pottery, and owner into one large broken pile. When the dust cleared, nothing was left standing. The young blonde stood at the eye of the storm, the ill fated discus lying undented at his feet. He picked it up and the boy from before snatched it again. "Nice catch." He said nastily and stalked away.

Ludwig stepped over to him. "Son-" he started.

All Hades broke loose then. The owner of the pottery shop lost his temper and shattered the last unharmed urn he had at their feet. "This is the last straw, Ludwig!"

A woman from the side joined in. "That boy is a menace!"

Another man. "He's too dangerous to be around normal people!"

His father cut across. "Quiet! He's not a bad kid! He just can't… control his strength." He trailed off.

The red faced potter finished it off. "I'm warning you! You keep that- that Freak! Away from us!"

The crowd around them dispersed. It was a long and completely silent walk home.

* * *

Feliciano found their son a while later sitting by himself on a grassy cliff overlooking the ocean. He sat next to him with a sympathetic smile. "Dear, you shouldn't let what those people said back there get to you."

"But they're right." Alfred stood up and began to pace. "I am a freak. I try to fit in, I really do, but I can't. Sometimes I feel like I don't belong here, like I'm meant to be somewhere else."

Feliciano looked down nervously before approaching him. "Alfred, son…"

Alfred just brushed him off. "I know it doesn't make any sense." He trailed away down to the ocean shoreline. His maternal parent chewed nervously at his lip, and then departed for home to speak with his husband.

* * *

Alfred hummed lightly as he picked up a flat stone on the beach. _"I have often dreamed, of a far off place, where a great warm welcome will be waiting for me."_ He skipped the stone and it disappeared past the horizon. _"Where the crowds will cheer, when they see my face, and a voice keeps saying, this is where I'm meant to be!"_

He started for home, deciding to climb a tree for a better look at the star lit sky. _"I will find my way, I can go the distance. I'll be there some day, if I can be strong. I know every mile, will be worth my while. I would go most anywhere to feel like I… belong."_

* * *

His parents were waiting for him when he got to the cottage. "Alfred, there's something we have to tell you."

It was a sincere story, while kind of awkward on Ludwig's part, but after the initial telling things clicked.

"So you didn't even try looking for my birth parents?"

"What? No, of course we did! Right, Luddy?"

"Uh… ja, ja we did." His father said with a somewhat strained smile.

(A.N. =_= You decide if he's telling the truth, because more than half the time I can't even tell what these people are thinking.)

"But if you found me, then where did I come from? Why was I left here?"

Feliciano unwrapped a cloth on his lap. Inside was a large gold medallion, a storm cloud with a lightning bolt engraved in one side. "This was around your neck when we found you. It's the symbol of the Gods." He passed it to Alfred who lightly drew his fingers over the design.

A burst of excitement launched their son to his feet. "This is it! Don't you see? Maybe they have the answers! I'll go to the temple of Berwald and-" He looked back at the people who had so lovingly raised him for 18 years. "You know, you guys are the greatest parents anyone could ever ask for, but… I gotta know."

* * *

Sunrise the following morning and Alfred had prepared thoroughly for his trek to the neighboring (A.N. Neighboring = many miles that-a-way.) shrine. He gave Feliciano one last hug, and his motherly figure wrapped him in a shawl. With a promise to write once he had things settled; the young blonde left his childhood home.

It was a long journey made easier as he chimed again. _"I am on my way, I can go the distance. I don't care how far, somehow I'll be strong."_ He'd traveled deep into the forests and across deep ravines, his once burdening strength, now a useful tool.

_"I know every mile, will be worth my while." _He ducked under a rocky overhang in dark storms and scaled steep hillsides to reach the towering temple to the king of the Gods._ "I would go most everywhere to find where I belong."_

He stepped reverently into the mosaic tiled room; it was illuminated with hundreds of torches and candles and the air was warm and comforting. On the farthest end was an intimidating statue of the thunder God himself. Taking a breath, Alfred held his medallion in front of him and asked. "Almighty Berwald, please hear me and answer my prayer. Who am I? Where do I belong?"

A wild wind blew in from outside, the lights extinguished. Just as the poor boy was considering if it indeed was impossible for spirits to attack the living, a bolt of lightning flew into the area, crashing directly into the statue. Moments later the tribute groaned and shook, the lids of the effigy's eyes wrenching open with a crack and a smile spreading across stone lips. Alfred simply gaped in astonishment.

The God reached for him. "M'boy. M'little, Alfred."

To this day if you asked him, our hero would likely state that he stood fearlessly as the moving statue of his father held out his hand to him. The truth, however, is that he screamed at such a high pitch that glass would have shattered had it been near and then ran faster than a mustang towards the entrance to the shrine… only to have the God lift him by the back of his tunic into the air. After this he promptly lost consciousness.

When he returned to the waking world, he discovered himself to be sitting on a pedestal next to his father's marble throne. The thunder God was reading from a comparatively miniscule scroll, it would have been hilarious if his son wasn't again on the verge of fainting. "All these years and this is the kind of hello you give your father."

"Father?" It came out squeakier than he intended. He cleared his throat. "Ehm… Father?"

The living stone put down the scroll and gave him a smirk. "Didn't know you had a famous father did you?" He tapped his chin with a finger as he observed Alfred. "You have your dad's beautiful blonde hair, and my shocking eyes."

The youth glanced down sheepishly before a thought occurred to him. "Wait, I don't understand. If you're my father, then that would make me a-"

"A God."

"A God." Alfred nearly fell over in shock as he huffed out a breath. "A God!"

His father shrugged. "Well you wanted answers, and I thought you were old enough now to know the truth."

"Then, why did you leave me on earth? Didn't you want me?"

His expression became sad. "Of course we did. Your dad and I loved you with all our hearts, but someone stole you from us and made you mortal. Only Gods can live on Mount Olympus, Alfred."

"And you can't do a thing?"

"I cannot." His son looked despondent. "But, you can."

"What? Really? That's great! What do I do?"

"Alfred, if you can prove yourself a true hero on earth your Godhood shall be restored."

"A true hero… Great!" His face fell in confusion. "Uh, exactly how do you become a true hero?"

"First, you must find the great trainer of heroes." He finished with grit teeth. "Gilbert."

His son either didn't notice this or didn't care, because immediately his face lit up in a wide grin. "So I just gotta find that guy, and become a true hero? I can totally d- Ahh!" He stepped off the high pedestal without thinking. The thunder God caught him before he hit the ground.

"Hold your horses now." He blinked in sudden remembrance. "Ahh, that reminds me." He brought his thumb and index fingers to his mouth and let out a shrill whistle.

The shrieking sound of a falling object drew their attention to the skylight of the temple. A star like thing was descending through the roof. As it reached the midway between ceiling and floor it exploded into the form of a winged horse with an excited trilling chirp. The steed flew in circles for a minute before landing in front of Alfred.

His father chuckled softly. "You probably don't remember Pegasus, but you two go way back, son." The horse sat back on his haunches, then reached forward, grabbed his skull, and promptly headbutted him.

After some time of getting used to the spinning room, Alfred smiled. "Of course, Pegasus! How could I forget?"

"He's a magnificent horse, with the brain of a bird." Pegasus tweeted in response.

Alfred jumped on his back. "I'll do it! I'll find Gilbert! Become a true hero!" The steed took to the air again. Berwald extended his hand and the horse touched down on it.

"That's the spirit."

"I won't let you down father!" The God's effigy took a breath and upon exhaling summoned a strong wind that pushed both of them onward, soaring into the sky.

"Good luck, M'son." The statue closed its eyes and a new lightning bolt struck it. The temple returned to the way it was before.

The duo twisted and turned, flying past stars and constellations. All the while a song of jubilant promise rang out. _"I will beat the odds, I can go the distance! I will face the world, fearless, proud, and strong! I will please the Gods! I can go the distance, 'til I find my hero's welcome right where I belong!"_

* * *

**Me: There you go. I can't do any more right now. As it is, I am sorry it took so long to get this chapter out, but I'm about to take a major step in my life and even then I still have to prepare for an upcoming overseas trip. Little time for writing will be allowed.**

**Ivan: I believe you are just being baby. Life is not so hard as you make it to be.**

**Me: T_T What do you know? Half the time I come in here to write, I find you totally sauced on vodka.**

**Ivan: And what is to be so wrong about that?**

**Me: *Pinches the bridge of my nose in frustration.* You know what? I'm too tired to deal with this. Ladies, Gentlemen, and Children of all ages, please review and I'll be seeing you when I can.**

**RR7**


	4. One Last Hope and Your Basic DID

**Opening!**

**Me: Fear not, for I have returned! And this is the chapter where things finally start to pick up!**

**Ivan: Why? What happens?**

**Me: *Giggles* Our wonderfully British love interest arrives today.**

**…And our "Awesome" trainer of heroes.**

**I own nothing sadly…**

**One Last Hope and Your (Not So) Basic DID…**

Alfred saw a large island growing as he and Pegasus flew through the air, some crumbling statues and ground fog below them. When his mount finally touched down he hesitantly slid off and took a few steps. The whole area felt eerie and almost supernatural.

He chuckled nervously, looking back at Pegasus. "Uh… you sure this is the right place?" The horse nodded. "Figured you'd say that."

Feminine laughter echoed from beyond the mist and Alfred snapped his head in its direction. He crept forward slowly, coming up upon a clearing where three beautiful naiads were practicing magic in their respective fields of nature. He ducked behind some bushes.

"Pretty hot, huh?" A voice said. Glancing next to him Alfred beheld grinning red eyes.

"Ahh!" He tumbled back loudly, unintentionally alerting the sprites in the opening. The three simultaneously gasped and then shrieked when the figure beside Alfred stood up.

"Aww, now you've done it!" The male was now revealed to be an albino wearing a long black shendty around his waist. This was not what drew the blonde's attention however, that honor went to the short black horns attached to his forehead and a terrifying arrow-tipped tail trailing behind him. "Girls, stop! Please don't go!"

They did exactly opposite of what he said and the weird creature tore after them. He jumped to catch the green skinned naiad, but inches from his target she appeared to burst into flowers, a second melted into the spring waters close by, and just as he secured his arms around the third she became a tree. He let go and kicked the ground in frustration.

The male then adopted a decidedly cocky air. He tsked and leaned against the laurel. "Nymphs, they can't keep their hands off me! Kesesese." He laughed.

The tree let out a disgusted huff and a branch swung around to knock him for a loop. The albino found himself rolling to Alfred's feet, whom coughed nervously. He made to stand and dust of his cloth. "What's the matter you never met a Kobaloi before?"

(A.N. Kobaloi - A species of mischievous creatures fond of tricking or frightening humans. The descriptions of them vary from goblinoid to humanoid, but most sources say they have shape shifting powers, so yeah, they can in theory be an awesome shirtless albino Prussian with slightly odd features. You're welcome.)

"Uh… No." The stranger plucked a clay bowl filled with grapes from the shrubbery they'd been hiding in. "Hey, maybe you can help us. We're looking for someone named, Gilbert."

He was answered by the male tapping the stem of the grapes, causing them to melt into wine. He took a sip from the dish. "Call me Gil."

He found his hand crushed in an enthusiastic handshake. "Oww!"

"Gil, huh? Boy, am I glad to meet you! I'm Alfred!" He let go and gestured to his winged horse. "And this is Pegasus." The steed knocked Gilbert's head.

"Ugh. Animals, hate 'em!" He said as he stumbled backwards.

"Dude, look I need your help! I want to become a hero! A true hero!"

The whitenette gave him a bored look before abruptly walking away towards a giant statue's head. It was fitted with a door and presumably served as the entrance to his home which was dug deeper into the mountain around it. "Sorry, kid, can't help ya." He stepped inside and began to swing the door shut behind him.

"Wait!" Alfred inadvertently pulled the door right off its hinges trying to stop the trainer whom glared at him. "Sorry." He gave him back the door which Gilbert re-attached easily. "Why can't you help me?"

"Two words: I am retired!"

The blonde paused. "But that's thr- Never mind. Look I've got to do this. Haven't you ever had a dream? Something you wanted so badly you'd do anything?"

Gilbert sighed. "Kid, come inside, I want to show you something." The man entered his home, leaving the door open for Alfred. Pegasus tried to follow momentarily before realizing the door was too narrow.

The blonde needed only to walk a few paces before he was overwhelmed with the memorabilia stacked along the walls, tables, and shelves. Distracted by these trophies, Alfred walked right into a large wooden beam suspended from the ceiling by two ropes and received a knock to the head for it.

"Watch it! That's part of the mast of the Argo." Gil scolded.

He rubbed his head as the words registered. "The Argo?!"

The Albino stuck his nose in the air. "Of course! Who do you think taught Jason how to sail? Cleopatra?" He proudly strolled through the rows of collectables, noting famous figures on the way. "I trained all those would be heroes. Odysseus, Perseus, Theseus, just to name a few." He turned their small portraits into the table hiding them from sight. "But every single one of those bums let the awesome me down. Either quitting before training was over or retiring once things got tough in the career."

He gestured to a statue on the far end of the house. It depicted a warrior in full armor, posed mid-sword strike. Gilbert's voice took on a hopeful note. "Then, there was Achilles. Now that was a guy who had it all. He had the build, the foot speed, he could jab, he could take a hit, and he could keep on coming!" That flicker of hope died in the wake of frustration. "But that frickin' heel of his! One little arrow with a slightly poisoned tip barely nicks him and- boom! He's history." He flicked the effigy's heel and it promptly fell apart.

The trainer pulled a long coil of navy cloth off the shelf. "Yeah, I had a dream once. I was going to train a hero so awesome that the Gods would hang a picture of him in the stars. …All across the sky." He unrolled the coil and hung it over the Argo's mast. Miniscule holes were cut in the felt and the light streaming through gave an imitation of a strong man's form shaped out of starlight. "And people would say: 'That's Gil's boy.' That's right."

He abruptly tore the cloth down. "Ah, but dreams are for rookies. A guy can only take so much disappointment."

"But, I'm not like those other guys, Gil! I can go the distance!" Alfred insisted.

(A.N. Yeah, he just sang a song about it last chapter! *Shot*)

"Here, I'll show ya!" He grabbed the man's arm and pulled him quickly from the house, sprinting over to a large broken stone discus.

"Jeeze, you don't give up do you?"

"Just watch this!" The younger male gripped the underside of the disk and with only minor effort heaved it into the air and flying past the horizon. (A.N. This object would then continue to orbit the globe for centuries to come before eventually crash landing in Roswell, New Mexico.*)

The blonde looked back over at the trainer whom stood in a shocked gape. After a few minutes he managed to cough out a breath followed by several mutterings. "H-Holy Tino… Ya know maybe I could actually-" Gilbert's hand then, seemingly of its own accord, swung upwards and slapped him across the face. "Ahh! No! Snap out of it! I am too awesome to be gettin' mixed up in all this nonsense again!"

The Kobaloi tried to stomp away and Alfred ran in front of him. "Please Gil! If you don't help me become a true hero, than I'll never be able to rejoin my father, Berwald!"

The albino raised a skeptical brow and then with a poor attempt at hiding his taunting laughter held out a hand to stop the teen talking. "Hold it! Berwald is your father?" He snorted. "Swe? The big guy? He's your daddy?!" Unsurprisingly, Gilbert fell over in a mocking heap. "Mr. Lightning Bolts?!" He took on an over exaggerated baby voice. "Read me a book, Dada?" Then a gruff baritone. "Kesesess, Swe: Onc' upon a time…"

Alfred frowned. "It's the truth!" This was met with a scoff of disbelief.

"Please!" Gil flipped to his feet and waltzed over to more statues and pedestals from his training days. _"So you wanna be a hero kid? Well, whoop-de-do. I have been around the block before with blockheads just like you! …Each and every one, a disappointment. Pain! For which there is no ointment!"_

_"So much for excuses, though a kid of 'Swe' is…" _ He rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, unheeding of the unusually concentrated foreboding storm clouds creeping up behind him. _"…Asking ME to jump into the fray!"_

"My answer is completely and totally: N-" A bolt of lightning nailed him from those same 'unusually concentrated foreboding storm clouds that were creeping up from behind him'.

When the smoke cleared his whole body had been charred, but through his cracked lips he managed to choke. "Okay!" This was actually said more to the sky than Alfred, but the boy didn't seem to care.

"Wow, really?! You'll do it?" He slapped him on the back, causing the Kobaloi disintegrate into dust before reforming.

"You win." He sighed.

"Cool! When can we start? Can we start now?"

"Oh Gods!" Gilbert pulled apart a nearby hedge and yanked out an old chest full of training supplies.

_"I'd given up hope that someone would come… Along. A fellow who'd ring the bell for once, not the gong!"_ When Alfred walked over to help with the heavy chest it fell open burying his new teacher in heavy metal weaponry and armor. _"Ugh! The kind who wins trophies, won't settle for low fees, at least semi-pro fees, but No! I get the green-horn!_

The two meandered around the island cleaning up old fields and track pitches. _"I've been out to pasture, found my ambition gone. Content to spend lazy days and exclaim 'I'm done!' But you need an advisor, someone much wiser…" _He helped the blonde properly string a bow and showed him how best to fire the arrow. _"…A good merchandiser an-…" _Gil neglected the rope that had been attached to the arrow's fletch, which caught his ankle and sent him flying across the training grounds from Alfred's strength. _"Ahh! There goes my ulcer!"_ The man grasped at his stomach.

Gilbert put him on a few sprint courses for that. _"I'm down to one last hope and that hope, it's you! Though kid you're not exactly a dream come true. I've trained enough turkeys, who never came through. You're my one last hope so you'll have to do."_ He glared at the sun dial and Alfred's apparently abysmal time.

The Kobaloi began to teach him the hero's rules. "Rule #6. When rescuing a damsel: Always handle with care!" The doll he set out for the youth to 'save' was promptly dropped along with him into a choppy river. He face-palmed.

The next lesson was dagger throwing. "Rule #95. Concentrate!" Pegasus tossed the boy some daggers and he immediately spun them outwards. In retrospect, Gil standing right next to the targets was probably the worst mistake he made that day. "Rule #96. AIM!" He cried as he pulled out a knife.

_"Demigods have faced the odds and ended up a mockery! Don't believe the stories that you read on all the crockery." _Back at the targets, Pegasus was moving them back and forth on a mechanism. _"To be a true hero, kid, is a dying art." _The boy missed them all and was toying with the last dirk. _"Like painting a masterpiece…" _Alfred turned and simply tossed it away, by a happy accident hitting a single 'enemy' at the exact center. _"…It's a work of heart."_

_"It takes more than sinew, comes down to what's in you. You have to continue to grow!"_ The blonde had run through the sprint course again, this time achieving a much faster time. _"Now that's more like it!"_

Alfred's final test was the most grueling and ridiculously complicated obstacle field in the world. He needed to take a running leap from a cliff, catch a rope hanging in front of it, and swing through blades, a spiked clap trap, and a crusher. This wasn't it though, next was two man-eating sharks and a flaming hoop. All this powered by a single crank Gilbert was turning. The trainer gave him a psychotic grin then waved a flag to signal the start. _"I'm down to one last shot, and my last high note. Before that blasted underworld, gets my goat! My dreams are on you kid, go make 'em come true! Climb that uphill slope, keep pushing that envelope! You're my one last hope and kid it's up to YOU!"_

Not only did Alfred manage to do all this, but he also managed to save the infamous damsel doll, land in the very middle of a circle of archery dummies, and decapitate them all by bending his sword and sending it flying like a boomerang. The arrows that still shot at him were carefully arranged into a large 'A' on his wooden shield and he caught his blade as it passed, flipping it back into its perfectly straight position. (A.N. OoO)

To say he was excited was an understatement. "Yahoo! Oh my Gods, did you see that? Next stop: Olympus!" Not one to let a pupil's arrogance get ahead of his own Gil bent down on his hands, tossed his legs up, and 'walked' over the now obvious wooden plank that spanned the same chasm Alfred just overcame by more maddening means.

The trainer gave an arrogant smirk as he maneuvered up to his student and righted himself.

The blonde's face fell. "Wha- Where did tha- Was that there the whole time?!"

"Yep." (A.N. XD)

Alfred's left eye developed a pretty funny twitch. "Son of a-"

(One Tantrum Later.)

"You know, I think after all of that I am entitled to real hero work!"

"Oh you think so?"

"I am ready! I wanna get off this island, battle some monsters, and rescue some damsels!"

The Kobaloi appeared to ponder this. "Well…"

"Come on, Gil!" Even Pegasus took on a pleading expression.

"Fine. You want a road test? We're going to Thebes!"

"Yes!"

* * *

The duo was flying over a dense forest on the winged horse's back. "So, what's in Thebes?"

"A lot of problems. It's a real tough town, a good place to start building a reputation." He would have continued, but a scream shattered the quiet of the sky. "That… Sounds like your basic DID. Damsel in DISTRESS!" The last part was yelled as Alfred immediately sent into a dive.

* * *

The disturbance was located at a waterfall and river source hidden behind some shrubbery, the three present first hiding to get a better look at the situation before running in.

From around the bend of a tree a lone figure in a white toga with an emerald cloak over it stumbled backwards. The person's face couldn't be seen as the hood of the cloak had been pulled up. A bow was in their right hand and a quiver of arrows was strapped to their back.

When whoever it was turned to make a break for shore a large hand came down and surrounded them. It was revealed the hand belonged to a gigantic creature that was half human and half horse, the river guardian and monstrous centaur, Nessus.

His lower body was a disconcerting navy and his upper body a lighter, but no doubt still ugly, blue. He laughed maliciously. "Where ya going, sweet heart?" A disgusted voice growled from beneath the hood.

"Nessus put me down or I'll shoot your eye out." If only to back up the statement he wrenched an arrow free from the quiver and pulled it back on the string.

"Ha! Tough talk, I like you."

The figure scoffed, Alfred now realizing it carried a British accent with it. "Get bent." The promised threat was fulfilled. The arrowhead was sunk deep into the monsters eye socket and he reeled back in pain dropping the person in the process. When the Brit landed the hood slipped back revealing short blonde hair, deep green eyes, and some rather interesting eyebrows.

* * *

"Holy cow…" The hero in-training seemed absolutely stunned. "Gil… that's not a… I mean he's a…"

"Yeah, not a damsel but a dude in distress." The albino shook his head at the look on his student's face and then turned back to the fight.

* * *

The archer tied his bow around him and then quickly scaled the tree he'd passed earlier. He broke several branches and tied them together with hanging vines while the centaur continued to writhe. Then, with a good deal of momentum behind it, launched himself and the branches down like a pendulum into the beast's skull. The attack was effective, and Nessus dropped like a ton of marble.

Still swinging and breathing heavily the green-eyed male let his body descend into the water. When he surfaced a familiar 'hero' was offering him a hand.

* * *

"That was awesome!" Alfred cheered as he stood to join the mysterious youth in the clearing. Gilbert grabbed him by the ear and pulled him back down.

"Hey! Watch yourself, we don't know if he's dead yet or if that kid is actually the dangerous one."

"But-"

"No! One must always analyze and prepare for any haz- Alfred get back here!"

* * *

"Hi." The cheerful teen said out of nowhere. The archer raised an eyebrow.

"Hello."

"That was so cool how you got that monster, I mean for a minute there I thought you were a goner! And then BAM! You just mash him in the eye and slam him in the head and wow! What a scene and here I was so worried because just a little ago when we heard that huge scream up in the sky. Gil said it was your basic damsel in distress and then I find out that you're actually a Dude in distress and-" Alfred went on like this for a full 6 minutes and 32 seconds before the archer broke in.

"THANK YOU!" The man yelled sarcastically to shut him up. "But I am well aware of all this and did not in any way require rescuing." The younger just continued to smile at him and then grabbed his hand, pulling him up whilst simultaneously introducing himself.

"I'm Alfred. What's your name?"

"Art-" Before he could finish, the blond found himself again restrained on both sides as the giant hand from before closed on him. Nessus had woken up and though now blind in one eye could most assuredly still fight.

"Nice try, sweet heart. But not good enough."

The new hero jumped in. "Hey! Leave him alone!"

The other man squirmed in the centaur's fist. "Get out of here you idiot!"

"But I can help!"

"Get moving, junior. I have…" Wiggle. "Everything…" Struggle. "Under Control!" Flail.

"Uh… Sir!" He dawned a tough guy voice. "Release that youth right this moment!" To the frustration of most parties he was batted away across the river with little effort by Nessus and hit a boulder on the opposite side. "Oww."

Gilbert, who had finally grown sick of just watching, ran out to the water. "Come on, kid concentrate!" Pegasus charged forward in agitation. "Uh-uh, no he's got to do it on his own. Alfred, just use your head!"

His pupil blinked. "Oh…" The younger blonde leapt to his feet and ran full pelt into the centaur's stomach. The archer in his possession was knocked from his grasp and into the river; the guardian was flung into the stone behind the waterfall.

Gil let out a shocked laugh. "Not bad, kid." He then muttered. "Not exactly what I had in mind, but not bad."

Alfred's grin could have split his face, but a sputtering caught his attention. The Brit had practically drowned under his cape. "Oh shoot! Man, I am so sorry." He lifted the other into his arms, much to the archers shock and indignation, and then set him on a fallen log on the shoreline. "That was dumb."

"Yes, yes it was." Said the green eyed male. They both turned suddenly when the sound of centaur's harsh breathing came at them Oh how wonderful, they were being charged.

The hero in training gave the older an apologetic smile. "Excuse me a moment." He ran at the beast, wound up his fist a few times and punched him past the stratosphere. The speed was so great that the monster's horseshoes flew off in the process. A minute or so later Nessus returned from his space trip, clunking his thick head into the stone of the river bed and sitting up only just in time to be brained with his lost horseshoes.

Alfred tapped his chest lightly and the horse-man dropped for the final time.

* * *

The youth evidently gained an audience in the time it took to battle the creature. The archer skeptically questioned Gilbert. "Is Wonderboy here for real?"

The Kobaloi naturally answered. "What are ya talking about? Of course he's real! I trained him, I should know." This is when the subject of conversation ran up.

"Aw yeah! Did you see that?"

"Rein it in rookie!" Gil immediately slipped back into 'awesome trainer of heroes' tone.

"What?"

"You got to focus more! And stop just blindly charging into things, you're gonna get brain damage and…" His student began to tune him out when he noticed the mysterious older DID walking away.

"Hey, wait!" He cut across his teacher and stalked after the other, even managing to ignore Pegasus who was trying to get a high hoof for a job well done. The two were left alone glaring at the metaphorical shiny object that had distracted their metaphorical toddler of a friend/student.

The first fighter was inspecting his bow in the sunlight for any damage. "So, are you okay?" Alfred asked.

"Well, all things considered, I may have some lasting spine problems, but not until retirement."

"Alright." The younger twiddled his fingers behind his back in slight discomfort at being ignored. "Your name's Artie, correct?"

"No." The older scowled at him. "It's Arthur. I didn't get to say it properly before being strangled."

"Oh, well, I like Artie better."

"Well then maybe I'll just call you Wonderboy, because I don't really want to bother learning your name." He huffed.

"Don't be like that! Come on, I probably never could've beaten that guy if you hadn't worn him down!" He cast a disarming smile.

Arthur sighed having come to the conclusion that while Alfred was impolite he meant no real harm. "Whatever. Thanks for the help anyway, but I must be off."

The younger male jumped in front of him. "Wait, where are you going? We can give you a ride." He gestured to Pegasus, whom took great offense at this and launched himself up into a tree to glare down at him.

The archer laughed. "Sorry, but I don't think your pinto likes me very much."

Alfred apparently didn't notice this. "What, Pegasus? Trust me he'd be more than happy to- Oww!" An apple from the branch above him somehow dropped, bopping him on the head. He looked up to see the winged horse chirping innocently.

Seeing this exchange evidently softened Arthur up a little. "No worries, Alfred. I'm stronger than I look, and I can take care of myself. Goodbye, you three." He turned and disappeared into the cover of the woods with a wave.

The future hero watched him go. "Bye." He leaned against a tree. "Wow, he's… something else. Isn't he, Gil?"

"Oh yeah, yeah, he's really something. A real pain in the ass maybe! Earth to Alfred, we've got a job to do remember! Thebes, Reputation, Olympus! Get on the horse." Said horse beat them to the punch, grabbing Alfred by the scruff of his tunic and tossing him between his wings. Gilbert jumped on after and they took to the skies once more.

"Okay."

* * *

Meanwhile, from below, inquisitive emerald eyes saw them depart.

* * *

***Yes. My head cannon from Hercules, was that he caused the Roswell Incident. I think the image alone is hilarious.**

**Me: Hope you guys had fun with this chapter and forgive me for taking such a ridiculously long time with it.**

**Ivan: So what is your excuse this time?**

**Me: Well first of all I was out of the country for a good long time, then after I got back home college began to kick my a**.**

**Ivan: I suppose I can allow that then.**

**Me: *Raises eyebrow* Allow? YOU allowing ME to be excused for life getting in the way?**

**Ivan: Yes?**

**Me: No, Ivan we need to talk. You have got to understand that I have other responsibilities besides you and this story.**

**Ivan: *Sigh* Okay.**

**Me: Good, so now to address what is most likely the biggest question raised by this part. 'Where is Gilbird?' Answer: I have him. *Holds up the little yellow chick* With all the craziness and monsters that come with doing a Hercules: Hetalia Edition, he could've been hurt. This is why I got Gilbert's permission to take care of him until the job is done.**

**Gilbird: Cheep. *Flies around and lands on the Authoress' shoulder***

**Me: Isn't he cute?**


End file.
